So I was thinking...

It has been almost 20 years since I went through a divorce. It is hard to believe it has been that long, on the other hand so much has changed! I was a single mom for 7 years and have been very happily married for almost 12 years. Most of all, I am the most me I have ever been. I have learned to be more confident in who God created me to be. In the past I had lost my voice and was looking for my value in a man. I was very much a people pleaser and rarely made my own decisions, even in the simplest things. I have come a long way! What changed, I grew in my relationship with God. I learned to get my value from Him and to believe what His word says about me. This is a process that did not happen overnight. Through counseling, bible studies, and surrounding myself with the right people, I learned that who I am is enough, God did not make a mistake, and I did not have to own the lies that were spoken over me or that I spoke over myself. 

Over the weekend I had a conversation with my...

 “If you could wave a magic wand and do anything, what would you do?” I heard myself respond, “I would speak for women of faith” That was in 2004.

 It was 2003 when a friend invited me to the Women of Faith conference. I had not grown up in church, but over the last couple of years had begun attending and reading my Bible. I had no idea what the event would be like but agreed to go. The conference was in the biggest arena in Dallas and was a sold-out event. The theme was The Great Adventure, and it was certainly that. As each of the speakers took the stage, what struck me the most was that they were not perfect. I believed that to be a good Christian, you must have it all together. At this time, I was in an abusive marriage and put great effort into wearing a mask of “everything is great.” That weekend I would see these women take the stage and tell stories of how God met them in their brokenness and restored their lives. These were...

When I was a kid, I struggled in school. From kindergarten on, reading was always a challenge. As an adult I learned that I had dyslexia. Back then children were not diagnosed, so as far as I knew I just felt stupid. Because it was hard to read, I spent a lot of time daydreaming or talking in class. My teachers did not appreciate this about me. I often found myself staying in from recess to write sentences. I would be asked to write ‘I will not talk in class” 100 times.

This was not helpful on so many levels. There is power in our words, the teachers were right about that, just not the way that they had hoped. When I would be called on in class to answer a question, I would be silent, I was too afraid of saying the wrong thing. I was convinced that my words were not valuable.

My sister, she was the straight A student! We were just one grade apart, so on the first day of school I would hear; “oh, I had your sister last year.” My immediate thought would be...

" You have to choose between acceptance and uniqueness. If you are addicted to affirmation, you will become what others want you to be, rather than who you were created to become." Erwin Mcmanus

Exactly one year ago, I felt like I got a word from God. It was not audible, but it was clear. He said to stop coloring my hair. Do you know how I know it was God? Because it was Definity not my idea. After coloring my hair from almost 40 years, I had no intention of stopping. I was, like most women, planning to fight this aging thing every step of the way. Isn't that what we are supposed to do? 

Society, marketing, family, and friends all seem to be in agreement, don't do anything that might reveal your age. I have to admit, I loved whenever someone would be surprised that I was a grandmother! But here I was, trying to decide if I should listen to what God was saying. Why does God care what color my hair is?

I decided the first step was to tell my husband. If he hated the idea, then I...

Where are all the single ladies? Statistically, 30% of women in their 40's, 50's, and beyond are single. For 7 years that was me. By the time I was 40 I had 3 boys and 2 ex-husbands. I really thought it was too late for me, I had blown my chance at my happily ever after. My parents were married over 50 years, I had always thought that would be my story, but it didn't look that way.

After my second divorce I was dating, if you want to call it that. You could also call it bad decisions. I was looking for a man to give me my value, to make me feel worthy. The problem is that I didn't know what that even looked like. Did it look like someone texting "Good morning beautiful"? Was it sex? Definitely not.

I was putting God expectations on a man. The only one that can give me my value is the one that created me. When you give someone permission to give you your value, you also give them permission to take it away. I needed to discover who I was in Christ. If I don't know who I am, how can...

It has been a minute! For years I used to blog, and I loved it! Unfortunately, those blogs are trapped in an old website, but some of those stories might make their way here, you never know! I believe we can be inspired when we hear another women's story. Because she made it, hasn't quit, or because your glad it wasn't you that that thing happened to! I will be sharing my stories as well as stories of amazing women that I meet. 

If you were reading my blogs back in the day, welcome back!! If you are just meeting me, Hi, I'm Barbie! I answer to Mom (to 3 boys and a bonus daughter), Mimi (to 6 grandchildren), Babe (to Richard), and Barbs (to various others). I am blessed beyond words with an amazing family and the best friends!

I am also a life coach, speaker, Founder of Brave 1, the Brave Gathering, and YML academy. After spending almost 30 years in the beauty industry, it actually makes perfect sense to me that I am still working to guide women to live their best life! My...